TGBL-"Respect Yourself".

So excited to be linking up again with Hayley and Lauren in their weekly linkup "The Girl Between the Lines"! This week's topic is talk about a lesson in life that you wish you've learned earlier in life. My lesson is to respect you. Read on to figure out why I picked this. 

Okay, so picture a little overweight awkward high school freshman surrounded by skinny beautiful girls whose bible was the Clique novels. She wears glasses, and was obsessed with the picnik website.She wanted friends, a boyfriend, and just to be popular. She loved music, singing and was considered an outcast.
Ladies and gentlemen, that girl was me.
Now, fast forward (can you believe six years) to 2014. That same little girl lost her baby fat, gained some friends, and honestly doesn't give a crap. She's not popular, but she has a lot of friends. She's a single lady because she doesn't want to date someone that's just there for no apparent reason. She's got style, she's got grace, she's a winner.
What happened to cause that change?
Well, let's talk about it. Between that time period, I got a couple of boyfriends, most of them lasted less than a week. I went through a terrible breakup and learned the hard way that no matter how much you wish that you want something then maybe it doesn't happen. I lost my self esteem, had depression, lost a ton of weight in a way that I wish I didn't, grieved the loss of my grandfather, and went through a lot of other stuff. During that time, friends came and went, styles came and went.
One thing that I wished that I learned while going through all of that was that you need to respect yourself and your needs. You're the one that has to deal with all of that. You're the one that doesn't need the people that bring you down. You don't have to apologize for being different, although high school doesn't exactly make it easy to stand out. I wish I learned that I didn't need the boy who told me that I wasn't good enough because then maybe I wouldn't have dealt with my body issues and handled them the way that I did. I wish that I didn't have to deal with that, however that made me a stronger person.
If I knew that then maybe I wouldn't  have dealt with that. However, there's something about learning lessons the hardway. It makes you a stronger person, and you know that whatever happiness that comes your way is something you fought hard for and deserve it. 

"The Answers Aren't In The Back" Girl Between the Lines

This week's Girl Between the Lines post is to talk about what you thought your life would be like now, and how is it similiar and different. Well, let me tell you. I had the hardest time trying to figure out what to write for this. But, finally I found something that floated my boat so here goes nothing.

It's 2014. I'm a sophomore in college, and I will soon be saying buh-bye to my teen years. I can't believe that time has passed as fast as it did. I don't feel like I'm almost 20. I feel the same as I always did. When I was younger, I thought that being in college would mean that I was going to be automatically fabolous and that I was able to put my life together. I would be sophisticated, and know what the hell I was doing. Well, that wasn't true. I came into college not knowing what to expect, and I still don't know what the hell is going on with my life. I've watched so many television shows, as the children went off and went to college. They had a fabolous time, naturally. I expected that my time in college would be something similar to that. As I entered adulthood, I coudn't help but want to know where all the answers were.
That's the thing about life, there's no answers in the back of the book. You're stuck in probelmatic situations with nothing but your brain and your instinct. I guess that I thought that when I got to be this age everything would fall into place, kind of like Cinderella's glass slipper fitting perfectly. I thought that I would have my license for starters. As for the rest of it, I kind of always knew that I wanted to do. I wanted to be a writer, despite the fact that I was unsure what kind of writer I wanted to be. Back then, I thought that I didn't want to be a journalist. Ha, I was wrong.
However, despite not having the answers to everything, I did find one thing that was the same. That I wasn't alone. Over the course of my college career thus far, in addition to high school, I have found some of the most interesting characters that you will ever meet. Each and every one is different. I always kind of knew that I had a lot of friends, and to be able to accumlate so many over a period of time reminds me that I will never be able to go through rocky seas alone. We're all messed up and imperfect in our own ways. But here's the thing-it's okay.
I can't plan or predict what the next few years is going to bring for me. I know that I am going to graduate in two years from May. I know that I want to be a journalist more than anything. But, that's all that I got. Sometimes, I wish that I can pull out some sort of crystal ball and just get the answers. Would I have a boyfriend? Would I be going to graduate school? I guess that the younger, more naive me thought that I would kind of know that by now. However, the older, wiser me begs to differ. I guess part of life is simply not knowing everything. The fun part being that you get to go through a twisted maze to get there. But, hopefully at the end of the day it will be worth it.

"Mi Manchi, Nonno". Girl Between the Lines Post

I am the closest to my grandfather than perhaps any other human being on the planet. He raised me like I was his own child, not a grandchild. When he died of Alzheimer's disease two years ago, my grandma gave me a few of his things. I honestly couldn't decide, because these things each have some sort of value of their own.

The first item is a stuffed monkey, otherwise known as Mr Monkey. Mr. Monkey resides on my bed, has a red T-Shirt. He has a banana in his hand. His tongue is sticking out, and he's a light and furry brown. Mr. Monkey is perhaps one of my favorite stuffed animals, because it kind of reminds me of my grandfather, silly, and always fun. My grandmother gave me him shortly after he died, and he's been one of my most prized possessions.  Whenever I hug him, in some weird way it reminds me of my grandfather. Even though he just sits there, looking
The other two items are his necklaces that was his, or were once his and was made for me. The first one is a necklace that was made from a tie tack. My mom had given it to me for my high school graduation, and I am so glad that she did because even though I rarely wear it it's my favorite piece of jewelry. The other two are gold charms that he used to wear all of the time. The first is a Saint Jude, and the second is an anchor that my mom got him from Hawaii.
I choose these items because I was really close to my grandfather, and I miss him terribly. Therefore, picking just one was a hard thing to do. I miss him more and everyday, so the fact that I own things that he once had has the most value than things that cost thousands of dollars. Whenever I look at these things, I am reminded of his fight, his smile, and the fact that he never once complained during his six year battle with Alzheimer's. Thank you Grandpa, for not only the material possessions, but for the wisdom that you've also left behind. Ti amo, il mio nonno. Mi manchi molto.*

*I love you, my grandpa. I miss you a lot.

Follow Your Heart; Girl Between The Lines

This week's post was to write about the best advice that you have ever received. It was kind of a hard one to pick out because I've gotten so much great advice over the years. Finally, it clicked. So, after much thought, the best advice that I have ever received was to follow your heart.

I think this is the best advice that I've ever received because I feel like the heart knows more than you do. It knows what you really want to are trying to hide from the rest of the world. Kind of like your Ego if you're a Freudian. Our brain takes care of the logic end of decision making. But, the heart takes care of the whole how do you feel about it?

This lovely piece of wisdom can apply when you're thinking about relationships. Let's say that you have two people that you really like and want to be with. The whole follow your heart thing can have an advantage here because then you kind of already know who you want to be with. If you can't choose between the two then maybe neither are right. One can say that the subconscious has a lot to do with that too. Freud, you will never escape me. 

But..it doesn't have to do with relationships either. This was a big part of my decision of figuring out what I wanted to do with my life. When I was in my psychology classes, something didn't feel right. At first, I used to be excited about going to psychology. Over time, my enthusiasm faded. However, I was always looking forward to my journalism class. I was fully engrossed in the subject. I wanted to write, because that's what felt right for me to do. Needless to say, I no longer plan on entering the mental health field. 

Sometimes, your heart knows what's truly right for you, even when you don't. So, in conclusion, the best advice that I have ever gotten was to follow your heart.

Dare; To Give (A Girl Between the Lines Post)

Note: I saw this post on a Beautiful Exchange's Blog, and I was inspired to join this linkup! It's called a Girl Between the Lines, where we go deeper then normal. Writing about those types of things is important as bloggers, because then we can expand our horizons, and become better writers. The prompt is to write about a quality about someone that we really like about them. I am so excited to write this prompt, because as a writer, I feel like sometimes we can be self centered. This gives us a step back, and a chance to write about someone else. I dedicate this post to my best friend, and I really hope that he likes it. 



In Italian, the verb dare means to give. Whenever I hear this word, I automatically think of Gabriel, my best friend. I honestly can't think of a better word to describe him, because he's the most giving person I have ever met.
Gabriel is one of the most selfless that I have ever met. He volunteers to teach English to ESOL students. He helps others, and gives to others, without worrying about what the personal cost is to him. Whenever he has a friend, a family member, or a person who just looks like they need help. He cares about animals, and has been a vegetarian even longer than I've known him. One of the best examples I have of this is whenever I am crying and upset, he is there for me. He listen and he truly cares about what I am saying. Whenever I am at his house, his immediate focus is to help me.
Thanks to Gabriel, I have developed a desire to make a difference in the world. He inspired me to become a half vegetarian. He taught me to be more giving, more understanding and less judgmental. Even though I won't be joining the Peace Corps or anything, I feel like I can make a difference with my writing, somehow.
Gabriel, you have many awesome qualities. You're sense of humor is on point. The fact that you're not afraid to be who you are is another. The fact that you're the best friend I could ask for is great too. But, my favorite quality of yours is the fact that you are so giving.