Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Cracking.

Lately, I've been going through a period of self-doubt. Am I smart enough? Am I pretty enough? I don't know exactly what is the cause of this sort of behavior, whether it may be the cause of having too many goals or expectations. I always worry about screwing up, whether with friends or with my future. I feel like I could do more then I am..and that often worries me.
I've always been insecure. I've always worried whether or not I'm pretty or whether or not I'm going to make it as something. The cure for most of this, at least for me is to talk about it, especially with someone who you trust. No stranger danger here folks.
I often wonder, and fear that I'm doing something wrong. I wonder if I put too much on my plate, or too much pressure on my back. I worry that I'm going to crack.
Then I got to thinking and what do I want in life? I want a person who will love me, and tell me that I mean something to them other then sexual relation. I want to be supported and to be treated, well nicely. I want to be successful, and I want to be, well good at something. I want to make a difference,  but most importantly, I want to be happy.
I wonder if I ever truly be happy. I crack under pressure, especially when it comes to school. I hate tests, and I love writing papers. I wonder if there's a such thing as a test paper?
Maybe, just maybe, I am enough. Am I?

No comments:

Post a Comment