Thursday, February 21, 2013

Dear Father.

Dear Father,
For years, you have plagued my life, a black hole in my childhood existence  You have a rep of not being there for me, a perfect track record that will always remain consistent  No amount of money, cards, or gift can ever change that. You lie, your nose as long as Pinocchio's, spinning a web so tangled that water can't slip through.
Father, you hurt me in every way humanly possible. You've abandoned me as a child. Once I begin to gather enough strength to stand, you come around like a hurricane to spiral me back down again. You spin the same old story round and round, until one day it falls down the drain, dropping into freefall.
It took me years, but I've finally come to accept what you've done to me. I can not control your actions, however I can control my own. You hurt me, by walking out, and be never being a series regular in my lifetime. That was your doing, not my own. You've made your decisions, and hurt your people. You still want to have contact, but do not understand that sometimes it's not entirely best for all of the parties that are involved. I forgive you, for forgiving is letting go of the negative energies that are surrounded, but the presence of them will forever remain.
I will however feel the most sorry for you, because it is you who missed out. You missed out of my high school prom and graduation. You missed out confirmation. You missed out on the everyday things, the things that aren't exactly Kodak moments. You can not get any of that back, no matter how much you want to pay, or want to.
I'm eventually growing to forget all of what's happened. Father, may you have a nice life.

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