Thursday, July 17, 2014

Will or Won't.

There's so many things in life that involve pushing past several boundaries, whether it's emotionally or physically. Some people put them up for sanity, and others put them up for emotional security. Therefore, there's so many things that we will do, or won't do. In relationships, this becomes more evident when we must consider how far we would go with our partner, and how much we should share with them.
In the show '19 Kids and Counting', the Duggars follow the rules of courting. They engage in side hugs and chaperoned dates with parents or siblings. When their engaged, they often hold hands. Many don't have their first kiss until their wedding day. Than there's people who live in a 'Sex and the City' type of lifestyle, when they sleep with guys on the regs, and go through a dry spell which is less than three months. There's multiple limits of what they will or won't do.  In each scenario, we view both extremes-purity and well sex.
But what about those who don't want to engage in either or lifestyle? I don't believe that I should sleep with someone the moment that we say we're dating, however I do think that kissing and hand holding is something that's important.  It helps a couple grow intimate. As does hand holding, which I would endorse heavily. I also believe that a couple should be able to be alone. Why? Because sometimes we just want to be with that person who makes you feel like you're the only one on earth. But, you have to know your limits and stand by them. If they go too far, then you have to open your mouth and say that it's not cool. And if they have a problem with it? Well, that's their problem, and you shouldn't even be with someone who wants to take you to new heights that you may or may not even be cool with.
I believe that limits are to each their own. We should be able to set our limits, not society, our friends, or parents. When you're dating as a teenager, maybe the latter would be appropriate. But, at the end of the day, only you know what's comfortable for you. You're the one that's executing the actions, so therefore you should be comfortable with what you're doing.
Many people don't realize that in order to do things, you have to put yourself first. Whether it's saying no to having sex, or going outside the box of what exactly what you want to do, you have to realize that at the end of the day you have to be comfortable. In relationships, we often forget that because of society, and the desire to please the other person. We often lose ourselves, which is a whole different issue altogether. At the end of the day, we are faced with two things-the things that we will do, and the things that we won't do. 

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