Wednesday, January 20, 2016

The Expectations, The Pressures, and The Roles

I hate the fact that there's a bunch of "shoulds" and expectations in life. I hate that you have to measure yourself in numbers, such as how much money you have, how many likes you have on your selfie and how high your GPA is to measure success. I hate that as a woman, I'm expected to fill the role as a homemaker and mother or fill the role as a bitchy boss with no in-between. I hate that if you don't have sex than you are considered to be a prude, but if you do than you're an automatic slut. I hate that boys will be boys when they do something stupid. 
There's so many expectations out there that it makes my head spin. As a woman, I'm expected to be a certain way. And, it's a lot of fucking pressure. I want to talk about the pressure of relationships, as it seems to be a prominent one. Some people expect you to wait until you have a ring and a cupcake looking dress to lose your v-card. But, what if I don't want to get married? What if I want to have a partner, someone who I live with but don't share a last name or a legal right to? Does that mean I should never, under conservative view points, never have sex? 
Society is changing, but still we romanticize relationships and weddings as being the ideal goal. We still view marriage as being an ideal goal, but we don't know what that little expensive rock entails other than forever love and happiness. We've grown to have expectations for what marriage is, what it means and what will happen when we are married. The same goes for a boyfriend. We expect to be happy, the label means that you're one of the cool kids. 
However, the unofficial relationships, the kids who are out there committed to each other but don't label it, are the ones are even better. They are the ones who are two people who think they are special, they love and care about each other, yet they don't say what the relationship is. In some ways, those are viewed as cheap relationships, because the couple is viewed as being screwed up because they couldn't commit and make the label work. But they are the ones who are making things work their own way. 
Success is also measured in numbers. How many likes did you get on the last selfie you posted? Did it make you sad that you didn't get as many as your friend? Or, what about your GPA. Did you make Dean's List? If you didn't, but still got a 3.0 GPA or higher, that means you've failed. And that's fucking stupid. 
I think relationships, numbers measuring your self worth and trying to live based on what other people want you to be is just dumb. In life, the only person you have to please is yourself. Not your mother, friend whose outspoken or your grandparents. People will have their own version of you, and therefore give you their opinion to do what they think makes you happy. However, you're the one who has to live with it, the one who has to look in the mirror in the morning and like what you see. So fuck them all, listen to your heart and remember that sometimes the only voice that matters is the one you have internally. 

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