Society and the Single Girl: Is Tinder The Only Way?

Recently, I was complaining to Gabu about not being in a relationship. Gabu, who is in a committed relationship, said to get a Tinder because it was the best way to meet guys pretty much, get dates and therefore get into a relationship.
My question is, is it really the only way? Are the days of actually meeting someone in person now forever gone, replaced by an app that's on a smart phone? Yes, Tinder is great for meeting people, perhaps people that you probably otherwise would have never met. But, it's just showing me people, and adding some skepticism. After all, how do I know that they are an actual person, not a Catfish? Or, better yet, how do I know that they don't want to kill me?
Statistics show that people who met online have a better chance of making it. But, has this become the only way to meet people? I would like to think that's not the case, however, more and more people are meeting each other on Tinder. Look at Gabu and their partner. They met on Tinder, and are extremely committed.
I'd like to think this about Tinder. It's a good tool to have in your toolbox if you're seeking a partner, however, it shouldn't be the only one that you use. Tinder's great because it exposes you to a bunch of people who you probably wouldn't have met otherwise. But, we shouldn't be using it as our only avenue to date people. I think there's cute guys everywhere, and you never really know who you're going to end up with. You could meet someone on Tinder. You can meet someone who was in your class, and fell in love. You can also meet someone at work, someone at church, and in the strangest of places. Just because you're on Tinder doesn't mean that you're going to get dates. It just means you're taking the first step to meet new people. It shouldn't shut you off from meeting people offline, because there's so many people around you that could be perfect for you. You just have to really look and really be open to taking risks. (The same goes for Tinder, I suppose.)
So, Gabu, I'm going to have to say that Tinder isn't the only way to meet people. I guess we're going to have to agree to disagree. 

The Cruel Reality of Working Multiple Jobs As A Full Time Student

Being a college student isn't all that easy, at least it isn't for me. I work three jobs, something that I mention quite often in my posts, especially as of late. Add in the responsibilities of being a full-time student, and you got a constant state of anxiety and depression, which is what I am living in. 

I can hear you saying 'why don't you cut something out?' Well, I need one job for the money, and the other two are journalism jobs that I have in my field, which is the much needed experience that every journalism person on the planet will tell you is necessary until they are blue in the face. And, of course, I need to go to school and do reasonably well, because without school or education, I wouldn't be able to get anywhere. 

With all this going on, I have no time for a social life, something that makes me sad. I rarely have time to meet with friends, to do things I enjoy and basically just to be a normal 21 year old. I'm not here to complain, but the reality just sucks. 

As the semester progresses, I have less than six weeks until I get through this tough semester. That thought gets me through, although it's not going to help me now. Going to a therapist helps me learn how to change my habits, to learn to be nice and less harsh on myself and to help me deal with the cruel realities of adulthood. In life, there's sometimes when you have to go through something hard to appreciate the fruits of hard work. 

At the end of the day, that's all I can hope for. 

Six weeks until I can leave behind town meetings, long days at school and trying to squeeze everything in less than a week's time. I know I can do it, but I know I need to add something else to the agendas as well. And that's taking care of Natalie, and just doing things that make me happy. Why? Because it's more important than any grade or salary that I would receive. That's what matters more than anything. 

So, readers, if you're in college and having a rough semester, know that you're not alone. Tell me about your own personal experiences in the comments below. I know we can get through this, together. Just remember your sanity is worth more than any ol' grade. It's even worth more than a million dollars. 

Matters of Mindfulness: Why Is Self Care Considered Selfish?

As a person whose diagnosed with severe anxiety, one of the things that my therapist tells me to do is self-care, which is do something that makes you happy or take care of yourself. For me, this is reading, going for a run, getting a cup of Starbucks' lovely Tazo Iced Tea, eating a particularly good cupcake or just watching Netflix. (Basically, anything that isn't a responsibility or school assignment, which seems to have taken over my life as of late.)

However, to some, taking a few minutes to just relax and take care of yourself isn't essential. It's selfish. I don't know how, because it's important to take care of a mental illness just as you would take care of a physical one. It keeps you healthy, and it keeps you sane.
Let me ask you something. When you're sick, what are you told to do? Get some sleep, get some rest and take care of yourself. The same goes for mental illness. We need to get some rest, and take care of ourselves. It's kind of like being told to eat your fruits and veggies as a kid. Only, it's about preserving your mental health, not your physical one. Maybe the mental health aspect is even more important than the physical one. But, why is it considered to be selfish to take some time for yourself? That I still don't get.
Maybe it was because we are programmed to do things--whether it's work-related, doing something else that's productive or doing school work. By taking five minutes to just chill, we can do those things so much better than if we didn't take those crucial five minutes away from the world and our to-do list.
So, to answer the question I posed in the title, no self-care isn't selfish. It's essential, just as trying to cross something off of a 'to-do' list. In a world that's number and accomplishment based, we often forget that we're still people. We are people who have imperfections and require breaks. That's way more important than crossing things off of a 'to-do' list. And, that's something that we all, whether we are stressed out college students, going through a rough time in our lives or even those who aren't suffering from a mental illness need to remember.

Semester Reading List Update #2

Hey everyone! So, it's spring break, so that means it's time to check in on my reading list progress! I've managed, despite the challenges of a tough semester, to get a few more books read. Currently, this semester, I've read nine books thus far. That's definitely surpassing my goal to read ten this semester! Some of the books were on the list, while others were not.
While Spring Break continues, I hope to use the time to catch up on my reading! I'm currently reading "Wedding Night" by Sophie Kinsella. What have you been reading lately?

Not On List Reads:
Books Not On The List:
"It's Kind of a Funny Story" by Ned Vizzini
"Distance Between Us" by Kasie West
"Better Than Before" by Gretchen Rubin
"What I Thought Was True" by Huntley Fitzpatrick

Semester Reading List:

1. The Fill-In Boyfriend by Kasie West 
2. Wicked by Gregory Maguire 
3. The Choice by Nicholas Sparks 
4. Crown of Midnight (Throne of Glass #2) by Sarah J. Maas
5. Every Day by David Levithan
6. All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven
7. Rocks by Joe Perry 
8. The Rosie Project by Graeme Simison
9. P.S. I Love You by Cecelia Ahern

Why Journal?

Journaling has been one of my favorite things to do since I was a senior in high school and began jotting down things in a notebook. Fast forward to the end of my senior year in college where I have seven notebooks filled and am currently working on the eighth. However, many may wonder--"why should I journal?"(Yes, I probably read your mind, I'm just that good.)

Source

But, there's something about filling a page with your thoughts. My therapist said one of the things to do when you're anxious is to journal. So many of my friends write in a journal, whether it's about what they did for the day or what they are currently feeling, including Gabu and their mom Kari.
The question is what do you say when you're writing? Well, anything really. The blank page can turn into a canvas of your emotion, the words painting a picture of you. For some, it's easy to get a journal, a pen and start scribbling. For others, it's not so easy, but have no fear. There are so many books out there to help you get started. However, it can be just as easy as just thinking about what you're feeling.
Unlike blogging, journaling can be private without the prying eyes of the Internet. You're writing just for you. I can not count how many times I've blogged about my love life, only to have the person I had a crush on click on it and figure out it was them. (Mad awkward, may I tell you.) That's why before I begin to write a certain kind of post, I ponder what the effects of that post would be. (It's sad, but there's certain things you just don't want people to read.) With journaling, you don't have to really worry about that, unless someone picks up your journal. Therefore, you can write about how hurt you're feeling about someone and not have them know.
I journal pretty much on and off, however, I fill a couple of them a year. There's nothing more satisfying then finishing one more journal and watching that pile get larger and larger. It's also a great feeling to just take some time and thumb through ones you wrote years ago, and remembering the day you sat down to write it. (I recently did that, and opened up my first journal. It was an interesting experience.)
Furthermore, with journaling there's no right or wrong way to do it. Just grab a pen,  a pad (They have some cute notebooks at TJ Maxx, that's where I get mine) and just write. It's that simple, folks.

I'm Not Dead

In case you all haven't noticed, I've been absent from this parts of the internet. Between school, work (I work three jobs) and all of the other things going in my life, I haven't been able to do more than a few posts a week. If that.
Well, Internet, let me tell you this. I'm not dead. I'm just really busy.
While blogging isn't a responsibility, it's still something that I enjoy doing. And, as I head into the next half of the semester, I want to devote more time for the things I enjoy. Blogging is one of them. I want to have more "blog-worthy" adventures with friends and take more time to blog my thoughts. The semester can get really hectic, and I'm so done with not being able to do the things I love. It's just not fair to myself, let's be realistic. And, by avoiding doing things I love, I just get upset. That's not helpful.
During this week, I have so much going on in the attempt of lessening the work load for when school's back in session. I know in the end, it will help me be so much less stressed as the semester goes on. However, it still isn't enough motivation to get me through. So, I decided to add more fun things for me to do on the list. That way, it will balance out the whole stress thing, which leads to anxiety. And, I'm so done with that thing.
At the end of the day, the semester is what you make of it. Yes, I would love for it to be over. But, sadly, it's not yet. So, I'm going to try to make the most of it, and try to keep fun things on the schedule.
May 10, 2016 is less than 60 days away. (I have a countdown on my phone) And then, I'll be greeted with the sweet freedom of summer (jk, I'll still be working, but not having classes for a whole three months will be a luxury.) I just know by my hard work, I'll be rewarded in the end. Well, hopefully. 

Book Review: "Better Than Before" by Gretchen Rubin

Disclaimer: I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review.

Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin

There are so many self help books out there, it can make your head spin. All of have the same goal-to help you become happy and make your life a thousand times better. "Better Than Before" by Gretchen Rubin is no exception. 
This isn't Rubin's first exploration of the study of happiness/habits, as she's the author of "The Happiness Project" and the "Happiness Journal." "Better Than Before" is like her similar works, however, it goes into the study of habits. 
Rubin goes into the four tendencies-rebel, upholders, questioners and obligors. These "tendencies" were the motivation behind your habits. I am an upholder, which means I'm self-directed, have little trouble meeting deadlines and am reliable. 
This book gives you a lot to examine, about yourself and the habits that you have. Ever since I read this book, I've been more critical of my spending habits, and asking myself why I'm buying things. This is a thousand times better than me just buying them for the sake of "treating myself." (The book even had a whole chapter on that very subject)
 It made me reflect on what I can do/change in my life to make it better. For example, one thing that I changed was putting things, whether they were responsibilities or not, on my schedule and in my planner. That way, I knew to make time for them. 
This book was extremely insightful, and pretty fun to read. I've been struggling with maintaining my sanity while juggling school, three jobs and life in general. This book taught me the root of some of my habits, and shed some light on what I have to change. I highly recommend it, because Rubin brings an extreme amount of insight that I would have never gotten otherwise. Furthermore, if you're a college student whose struggling to create positive habits or just a person trying to get a few good habits under their belt, consider giving "Better Than Before" a read.