Nowadays, there's so many different kinds of relationships that go much further than the 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend' label. There's friends with benefits, there's people who get together for sex and of course there's just two people having fun without the label. However, I must ask the hard question. How do you define a relationship? Like the real thing, where suddenly you feel it in your bones that he's the one. (Or she) What if you're committed to each other, but not to the label of significant other or partner? What is someone to do?
I don't know much about dating. My past two relationships were about five years apart. Both of those people were people who considered themselves to be my boyfriend. Especially the first. The second thing was something...but I didn't know what it was. And instead of having fun and enjoying it for what it was at face value, I constantly stressed out over what this was and where was it going.
Now, as I enter my twenties, I ask myself what does this all mean? What does it mean to be someone's boyfriend or girlfriend? Is it someone that you have fun with, really like to the point where they are the root of your smile and just want to be with? Or, is it someone who you like to spend time with, and you don't want to be with anyone else? That's my definition of a significant other or a boyfriend/girlfriend, but having that label in some senses equals that extra security blanket. Is the label just that extra thing to have, kind of like one would have extra money? And what does the label mean, exactly? What if you have something that is better than what those with labels entail, but once the label is put on, then things shift?
I have so many questions, which is good for a journalist. However, it's bad when I'm impatiently waiting for the answers. I've written about relationships in my blogs in the last five years, but I wonder even if I got older if I'm wiser. I still don't have the answers to everything. Whenever I talk to a cute guy, getting his number is so scary for me. I don't know what it means to have a boyfriend, because I've never had the real thing. And when I tell people about that, they say "don't worry, you'll find someone." Is having the real thing, a boyfriend (in my case as a cisfemale) the answer to all of my questions? The real thing being defined as having someone whose your boyfriend on the internet, because it's that official? Or is the real thing what you feel when you're alone with that person, they are holding you, and it's your definition of perfection?
A little food for thought. Are we after the meaning of the label, or are we just interested in having the label?
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