Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Society and the Single Girl: DTR

I can honestly compare having a crush or a thing going on with a guy to the way that we're sick and go to the doctor and have some sort of weird illness going on with ourselves. Define the relationship for me. Is serious enough that I should look into buying a dress and a plus one to attend your wedding, or will you be going out to the bars for a hookup soon?
DTR. Define the relationship. It's also known as that awkward talk that no one wants to have with their significant other in their lives because let's face it, it's not pleasant. Especially when there's a fear running around of putting yourself out there just to be flat out rejected. How do you define a relationship though, when each and every one is so different from the other how can you define it?
The question is, how do you sit down and have that talk? Well, you're dating a few weeks now, or hooking up. You're wondering if it means something to the other party that is being involved, or is it something that is just 'for fun' and not going anywhere.
It's awkward, but you've got to do it. You need to know where you stand, and lay out your feelings out on the table. Personally, I would rather be standing on a string than have that conversation because you have a fifty fifty shot of being happy, or a shot of being flat out rejected. Sometimes, feelings just get hurt.
Defining the relationship that helps you realize the amount of clarity that you need in a relationship. When you do there's no blurred lines, and there's no chances of saying 'well you did xyz and therefore you're my boyfriend/girlfriend.' If you keep it in limbo, then you're basically playing a game where everyone's feelings are at complete and total risk of getting hurt.
Everyone has to do it one way or another. It's kind of like loosing your baby teeth. Painful, but once it's gone you'll feel a lot better. And hopefully, be changing that relationship status on Facebook.


  1. I think it's always good to know where you stand.

  2. I think you have to have that conversation at some point. There's no way around it. For me personally, I probably asked "too soon" when I first started hanging out with my now boyfriend. But that set the expectation of open and honest communication throughout our relationship. Now, five years later, we're going strong because of being to the point and open with each other.