Sunday, February 23, 2014

I've Got Something to Say.

There's a point in every flirtationship, about to be relationships, and even some friendships where you realize that there's something that needs to be done about this, also known as getting up the lady balls and telling them how you feel. This is the point where you catch a case of the feelings, and wonder 'where the hell is this going to go?'
If you do nothing, than the answer is nowhere. But if you do something, then the answer is somewhere..possibly. The thing that each and every one of my friends have drilled into my head is that 'Natalie, you got to take some kind of risk.' AKA letting my feelings be known the person that you are talking about, not just your friends. 
I guess what comes with that is always and forever going to be the fear of rejection, of him looking at me like I am some kind of moron, or feeling at all. I guess the big thing here is worrying whether or not those feelings will actually be reciprocated, or will I be left just wondering, fiddling my thumbs waiting for him to tell me that he likes me. Which may or may not happen.
This is my cue to take the wheel. This is my cue to actually make some kind of move and get some kind of thing done. Sometimes, I wish that I was Lorelei Gilmore. I wish that I had the nerve to kiss someone just because I wanted to know what it was like. Not everyone has that insane amount of nerve. I wish that I did,
because then I wouldn't be writing this post. Instead I would be telling you about how I took that risk, how it went and all of that fun stuff.
I wonder how do we get from where we are now, to where I want to be. I realize that sometimes we have to roll the dice. My question is, how hard do we need to do so? My innate fears are you laughing in my face. I've always had problems with letting people know how I actually feel about them. Was this a result of some kind of fear that developed when I last put myself out there? Or was this something else?
I wish that I had Lorelei's sense of confidence. I wish that I could say 'Hey, let's date." I have the deepest respect for people that can do that at the snap of their fingers. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I wonder where my soulmate is. My question is what if when you meet the person, will I run away from them like a frightened little deer?

2 comments:

  1. how does this said person act when he's around you. does he constantly look at you? do you look away and then he's looking right at you. does he flirt with you? anything? he may be just as scared as you are. best of luck hun. took me 3 or so to finally meet my sweetie after we met thru mutual friends on facebook and also talked by phone until i was ready to meet.

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    1. It's complicated to explain on blog, but he's basically giving me mixed signals...thank you for that and the advice!

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