Monday, October 6, 2014

Single By Choice

There is this song by the band 'The Bangles' called 'Single by Choice.' Despite the fact that I haven't listened to it for about two years, it's been stuck in my head lately. As a single girl, I can relate to it, because many people I know think that being with someone is their main priority in life. Needless to say, it's strange that some people believe that every woman needs a man in her life to complete her. Or, at least I do.
I've heard all of the things that people in relationships say to you when you're single. First, the ever so annoying question of 'why are you still single?' It is usually followed by the equally annoying 'You should try Tinder', 'stop watching Netflix and actually go and be social', or 'you'll find a good guy when you're least expecting it.'
How about no? #sorrysonotsorry
I am not single by choice, but single by fate. I've tried the whole online dating thing, but I would rather not be looked at like a piece of meat. Let's face it, the types of guys on Tinder are a bit obnxious, and I find them to be very obnoxious. Once again, I am so not sorry for my opinion. I work two jobs, and I go to school, which I want to actually succeed in doing. At the end of the week, I find Netflix to be a relaxing way to kick back and enjoy my day as it comes. I also don't like going out clubbing because I don't want to date the kinds of guys that hang out in bars. I  don't want to be someone's hook-up, or someone's one night stand. I am not that kind of girl, nor will I ever be.
Romantic movies have also clouded my judgement into being a combonation of fate, and in the end, the guy will come to you. Life is not like the movies, although let's face it sometimes you wish that Justin Long was your knight in shining armor to save you when you're a damsel in distress. Am I the only one who wants that? No, just me..okay cool.
As a younger girl, I've played with Barbie, who naturally has a Ken right beside her. Barbie was superwoman with her many outfits, and career choices. But, she had to have Ken by her side. (I was a 90s kid, this was before they broke up.)  Naturally, this programs girls into thinking that they have to have a man, in order to be successful.
I've been single for five years this October. Yes, that's a long time I know, and I'm working on getting some cats to become the crazy cat lady. (Except I'm allergic, so I don't know how that's going to go, so whatever) I believe that love is going to happen to me well whenever it does. I am the victim of fate, so hopefully I'll have my own love story to share with you before I go onto becoming queen of the universe. I believe that there's more to life than just becoming someone's wish, contrary to popular belief.
Of course, over the past five years I've been the type of person to see cute couples on my social networking and just for a second have a pang of jealousy to wishing that I was in their shoes. As a private person, I am not sure if I'll want to post my relationship status for my 1,000+ friends to see, at least not right away. I am the type of person to gag whenever there's a post about love, well most of the time.
 I'm not axing relationships, because I do eventually want to be in one. I do want the ending to my movie. However, I don't want that to be the only point of validation that I have. I don't want to be viewed as pathetic when I say 'I'm single.' Not having a boyfriend isn't the end of the world, despite what others may tell you. Eventually I'll find my man with my glass slipper. But, don't take pity on me because I haven't found the one that makes me happy. In the mean time, can we celebrate the fact that I work two jobs, and go to school and still manage to keep my sanity?
Thank you, and good day.

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